How Can I Manage My Fear So It Doesn’t Control My Life?

How Can I Manage My Fear So It Doesn’t Control My Life?

woman with glasses, leaning on a bed while thinkingEach and every one of us can become overwhelmed with fear. It can be one of the biggest setbacks in a woman’s life.

  • Fear of not getting the job or position you want.
  • Fear of being rejected.
  • Fear of failing.
  • Fear of being alone.
  • Fear of not being able to choose.

Fear can try its hardest to hold you back, but you don’t have to let it. Here are 7 ways to manage fear so it doesn’t control your life.

Separate What You Perceive From Reality

When you are looking at your reality, often your perception is distorted. This can be caused by past experiences, emotions and even prior knowledge. Learning to acknowledge that your perception is not always the reality of the situation can help you control your fear.

Perception acts as a lens through which we view reality. – Jim Taylor

Identify The Emotional Trigger

When you experience fear, usually there is something that will trigger you, or set you off. This could be rejection, criticism or feeling unwanted.

Identifying this will help you to be more prepared for it next time.

Understand Your Responses To Fear

Often fear takes over your body, not just mentally but physically. It can affect different people in different ways. Learn how it affects you and do the work to take care of your body.
If you hold stress and fear in your back, you can learn stretches like foam rolling or even try your hand at yoga to help avoid the pain.

Practise Being Self Aware

Fear can come from being unsure and having self doubts.
Keep note of what you are saying internally.

  • Are you speaking positively to yourself?
  • Would you talk out loud in that way if others could hear you?
  • Would you speak to someone else like that?

If you wouldn’t say it to a friend, don’t say it to yourself.

Reminding yourself of your strengths can have a big influence on your psyche, and in turn help you squash those fears.

Write down all the good things that you have done, today, in the last hour or last week. Whatever time frame you need. Be grateful for your strengths.

Talk About It

two women smiling, talking to each otherSimply talking to someone about your fears can have more of an impact than you realise. A co-worker, a friend, a family member.

Hearing it out aloud can often reduce the affect that the fear has on you. Sharing these fears with people can take away how scary they may seem.


Breathing can help to ground you and centre your body. A great breathing exercise is the 5-5-5.

  • Inhale slowly through your nose for 5 seconds.
  • Hold that breath for 5 seconds.
  • Exhale through your mouth for 5 seconds.
  • Repeat.

You can get into the habit of starting your day with this, or even using this technique when you feel fear creeping in.

Create a Safe Space for Yourself

Surround yourself with supportive friends and family. Set up an area where you can relax and feel safe.

This sense of comfort will soothe you and allow you to start facing your fear. Start implementing these strategies into your day and don’t let fear control your life!

Start by reaching out. Let’s see how far we can go together – maybe coaching is for you!